We are just going to pretend that the last fifty-so pages didn’t happen, which means someone needs to rewrite the whole Alice in Wonderland thing. If someone wants to make Alice the villain, I won’t stop you either. Someone has to make the blonde the antagonist and the brunette the heroine, right?
Sorry, a little annoyed about the hair color choices for villains and heroes. Let’s get me back on track.
Heartless is so, so, so, extremely, heartbreaking that you’ll need to not have a heart when you read it if you don’t want to end up screaming in frustration at the ending. Which, of course, we all know ends horrible because she is “The Queen of Hearts” and she is a villain and villains don’t have happy endings like the heros.
UGH THIS STINKS.
My heart hurts so badly for Catherine.
Catherine is a baker. Her parents may not encourage her and she may be stooping way lower than her station, but she bakes nevertheless because she finds her passion in it.
So when her mother is setting her up to become queen, which unfortunately means marrying a too ‘merry fellow’ who is just too giggly and obnoxious and also not opening up a bakery with her maid Mary Ann, she isn’t too thrilled. In fact, she gets her sidekick, Cheshire, to distract the room full of people in order to sneak out and not hear her fate sealed by the King’s announcement.
YES, my dear readers, we have the Cheshire. He is a gossip and very much a cat in every single way. If anything, this is where I would have gone differently with this retelling (Prologue?). I mean, it makes sense that a disappearing cat would be the perfect gossiper, and now that I think about it, the original Disney movie kind of pins him for a gossiper; but, I feel there could have been more of a character there.
Anyway, Catherine, after some unfortunate events, finds herself being rescued by the new court jester, Jest. Yes, sadly we go down the rabbit hole of instalove a little here.
But I kind of didn’t mind it? I kind of instantly fell in love with Jest myself? Can I keep him, please? He is so gentle and sweet and wonderful and mysterious and how can you not fall in love with him?
Can you see the problems that are unfolding yet? Catherine wants to open a bakery with her maid. Catherine is trying to demote her social status so she can go after her passion of baking. Catherine’s parents want her to marry the king. The king has no redeemable qualities. The new Jester (Jest) is too irresistible. He is also below her station and is not in her parents’ plan.
Have I mentioned there’s a Jabberwocker somewhere in the mix of this? Oh, and you meet the Mad Hatter (but he isn’t mad and his name is Hatta)? He plays a big part in this whole beautiful disaster.
Marissa Meyer’s writing is just as marvelous as ever and her retellings are just as great as ever. I wish she could have made this a happy ending, but then again, I probably would have hated it. It’s always sad to see how the villain became the villain, and this one probably breaks my heart the most. I love this story so much and will recommend it to all ages and lovers of Wonderland.
But alas, we come to our end….
which is her beginning…